Holy Pantaloons

So I just got back from another two-beer lunch...but that's not why I'm writing (been there, done that). I'm writing because I discovered something while in the bathroom.

Intrigued?

Don't be.

I realized, whilst enjoying a long-lasting post two-beer seal-breaker, that there is a rather large hole in my pants. Yes, a hole. A hole that is most certainly visible to those looking for it. It is too high up to be hidden while walking (though not so high up as to be blatantly obvious -- phew!).

Can you guess where the hole is situated? I don't think I need to clarify.

I know not from where (or whence) this hole came. I only know that it's there now...and that it's trouble. How will I get around the office? I can't very well wheel around in my chair all day (or can I?). I can't tie my wool coat around my waist (which, by the way smells like sweaty sheep -- note to self: never wear a wool coat on a rainy day).

What to do?

I've already discussed the concept of hiding under my desk in a previous blog (ps - these are the very same pants I was wearing in that blog...is a little piece of my stupid history dying today? Will I have to throw out these wonderful pants?).

This doesn't seem like a problem that I can resolve with a safety pin (though I should note that most problems can be solved with a simple safety pin)...A pin in the crack doesn't seem particularly "safe" (boo -- that was terrible).

I'll stop now....mostly because there's no point to this story. No happy ending. No resolution. I leave it to you. Please save me from my life of stupidity! I hope you haven't ditched me yet for my sporatic blogs...